And none of it is working. Something drastic is needed. Something really big and really bold.
Somebody needs to rob the grave.
Truthfully, the grave that I thought needed digging up was Buddy D's, so he could get back on the radio and call out this team for the bunch of squirrels they have become, maybe put the fear of the Point After in their hearts.
But that would not only be illegal, but messy.
So, until someone comes up with a better idea, an exhumation and a visit to St. Roch's may be the Who Dats' last hope.
Until then, the 2006 season still lies dormant under the turf at Saints Camp, resting in uneasy peace.
Also, coming closer to nailing it:
Now it's just more about preserving the bond that was made last year, and the year before that, preserving that intangible gridiron chakra that led to a nearly rapturous love affair between a city and a team.
"When the Saints used to lose, I felt I had a better sense of community. We were never really football fans around here. We were Saints fans. And those are two completely different things."
Finally, he closes with a quote from Deuce McAllister, who we have to think is one of the greatest guys in the NFL right now:
"Throughout our tenure together, the bond we have established is one that can never be broken and I find solace in knowing that win, lose, or draw, we all bleed 'Black & Gold,' " Deuce wrote.
He had me at hello.
Deuce signed his letter with one word: BELIEVE.
So, to all the national media attacking the Saints, remember: they may suck, but they're our suck.